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International Psionics Researcher/Author/Journalist

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Strange Energy Sensations


I figured this would be a good place to discuss all of the strange sensations we get in the hopes someone may have something to compare it to.

Lately since I've stopped journaling I've been working pretty hard at focusing inwardly and just experiencing things. I found that journaling was just making me focus on the experiences in the sense that if something didn't happen that I was doing something wrong and it wasn't a successful day. Lame! lol. Anyway, since I've started doing this I've found that my energy experiences has been more frequent and bizarre.

My most current item that I've been experiencing lately has been the sensation of cool energy leaving or entering (can't tell) my left foot just in the gap between the toes and the ball of my foot. Any thoughts on this? It's random when it happens but when it does I may as well have stuck my foot in a pair of shoes with a hole in it and went walking outside in the snow.



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Psionics Journalist

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Cold sensation...cold chi? If its painful may be an unopen chi channel maybe? is it the right foot? Then its from the years of sex, if its the left then I dont know.

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It's my left foot. I guess I should have specified and it's definitely not painful. I've had cold chi in my third eye and brow chakras before and it would make sense that it may be the same energy. I hadn't thought of that.

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Alright, so the cold feeling just happened again and I was paying closer attention. It almost feels like energy is oozing out in a puff of cold. If you've ever seen something deflate slowly it would probably be similar to that. The cold sensation stays for a while usually though it didn't this time. I'm in a pretty warm environment so to say it was from the space around me would be inaccurate for sure. Makes me wonder if something is building up and then releasing there in my foot.

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Could be yin.
I wouldn't worry about it if it's not painful. :)

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I'm not necessarily worried about that specific thing though I do like to learn instead of just wondering what is happening. I have had some interesting experiences lately as well that have made me feel like I'm sick but I'm not and that I've got uncontrollable energy swirling around inside me. I had an experience from it while driving where it felt like half my face and left eye was closing and that I was going to lose my vision for a moment. The energy from that swirled up from my belly like a fire. And an hour later when I had gotten home, because I'd be a fool to keep going to work with that happening, I felt like I was going to be taken OBE or something while I was laying in bed resting. For some reason the cold feeling in my foot is more intriguing. lol

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Your cells; chakras, & nadis breathe. I want to recommend cellular breathing again in light of your recent cold foot experience:)



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I will do that. I find it interesting that not long after posting this my right foot started doing it a little. It's still mostly my left foot though.



-- Edited by limpidprogress on Wednesday 20th of January 2016 06:41:15 PM

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So I did one session of cellular breathing and I have been dealing with an explosion of anger since then. Any ideas what this means besides the fact that it's some kind of blockage maybe(?).

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Of course you are an individual, so what comes up for you is individual as well. The more deeply you relax the body with somatic meditation; the more frozen trauma will thaw & rise to the surface. When this happens, move into sitting meditation; be present with whatever comes up without running, pushing it away, judging, or trying to control it.

The intensity which arises wants to resolve itself, if your ego relaxes enough to allow it:)



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Seems you have to keep repeating yourself about it being individual in the experience. I think that I was hoping for a different response and that is largely due to my inability to ask the right questions. The thing about it is that the anger didn't rise up during or moments after the meditation. It was more like an hour later and was in full force for days. I only barely started getting a handle on it yesterday and it seems largely calmed down this morning. I think I am beginning to understand the process of being present though. I decided with my celibacy that I would watch myself like a hawk for whenever sexual urges rise up and I'm seeing it happen when it's tiny and it's amazing how easy it is to brush it off when it hasn't turned into a raging torrent. Would that be similar at all to what you're trying to say?

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limpidprogress wrote:

The thing about it is that the anger didn't rise up during or moments after the meditation. It was more like an hour later and was in full force for days. I only barely started getting a handle on it yesterday and it seems largely calmed down this morning. I think I am beginning to understand the process of being present though.


Melting the traumas takes time, and it's a background process. After initiating the process, it may work in the background for weeks. The effects may at first be too small to even notice, but they're there .. it's all melting and dissolving gradually.

 

limpidprogress wrote:

I decided with my celibacy that I would watch myself like a hawk for whenever sexual urges rise up and I'm seeing it happen when it's tiny and it's amazing how easy it is to brush it off when it hasn't turned into a raging torrent.


"like a hawk"

You've hit one of the key practises of the ancient Toltecs, which is described in Castaneda's books. :)
They would "stalk", or in other words observe themselves like hunters looking for weak spots (predictable patterns in behaviour, thought processes and energy leaks). They would imagine their death always hunting for them from their left like that. So, in order not to fall prey, they would try to become their own best hunter (outsmarting death).

Though, I would suggest finding a way to utilize the fuel instead of piling it up until it overflows. For me, wearing warm clothes and focusing on the right hemisphere did the trick this time.



-- Edited by Sussch on Thursday 21st of January 2016 04:06:34 PM

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That's interesting that they would treat self focus as a way to fight off death. I've just been making sure that there is no chance that the sexual desires will slip past me unnoticed which I'm hoping will teach my subconscious that it is the same even when sleeping and I'll stop this night discharge I keep running up against. I have sufficient will power when I'm awake but that all seems to be useless when I'm sleeping. Wet dreams suck big time. Since I started this intense focus I've noticed a larger amount of energy building up in my body at different times than I've ever had before. I think it may be why my left foot started doing the cold thing. It has definitely brought to light some little behaviors and thought processes that I've not noticed before. Every single time I've felt the urge to screw around I've also noticed a little bit of depression hiding out behind it. Very fascinating.

Though, I would suggest finding a way to utilize the fuel instead of piling it up until it overflows.

That makes sense. It's hard to feel the energy though without it piling up first. I can't focus when I can't feel it and I can't focus when I feel it. lol. I know that somatic practice helps with the fuel buildup and distribution to some degree. What would you recommend? I've heard of other people taking the energy up their spines and going through the micro cosmic orbit or whatever it's called and converting it into something else.



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limpidprogress, there is nothing to get a handle on. Whatever sensations...whichever feeling may arise from practice; rage, lust, jealousy, paranoia, etc., allow it the space to exist without meddling in it. To be present, is to witness phenomena without judging, or acting on impulse upon it. Ego, wants to manage reality, & therefore can't truly experience reality. It's like the fullness of reality shows up as guest to your front door, but is only allowed across your threshold if you get to hack off the guests limbs, then boil him in oil:)

We experience the intensity of reality breaking through...interrupting our notions about how things are. The impulse of the ego is to make up stories, or take action to get a handle on things, but what if you chose not to judge; what if you refrained from acting. It takes training, but this is what sitting meditation is for. When you just sit, focusing only on your posture & dan tien, all manner of phenomena arise, but instead of acting out, you stay with the object of focus, the posture. Over time, you begin to see more clearly that things are not really solid, & they begin to loose power over you.

Concerning nocturnal emissions & celibacy; what if you simply stopped worrying about it. Of course practice celibacy if you are moved to, but watching things like a hawk, doesn't sound like it's bringing joy to your life. What if you were to let go, & show yourself compassion? Remember, ejaculation is a stress response in the body; orgasm on the other hand, which you find in the bindus, is a relaxation response:)



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Are you sure there's nothing to get a handle on? It seems to me that there would be a need to get a handle of some sort on what is happening before you'll be able to even process/observe what is happening. For instance the moment I decided that masturbation was not an option and that I was going to need to put in the effort to identify what caused me to need to masturbate I started noticing the underlying emotions that were causing the desire to explode out of control. Perhaps I'm just not understanding or not explaining what I'm saying very clearly when referring to watching like a hawk. Perhaps I should maybe say that focusing like a hawk is akin to concentrating intensely on the experience and that is allowing me to not ignore it?

I can really see how the ego wants to control reality by ignoring 99% of it whenever possible and my recent self discovery makes me believe that this new area of focus is allowing me to move past some of the ego. It would seem to me that this is part of the training that you're talking about. I would seriously love these emotional/physical issues to arise during my meditation sessions so that I can actually attribute it to the practice instead of it happening hours and sometimes days after when it's out of sight and mind. It would definitely help me a lot to not get confused about whether it is a result of that or something else in my environment. I want so badly to get rid of any notions I might have but how am I to do that with such a huge gap between the source and subsequent experience? I find myself acting out and getting angry, depressed, or whatever nonsense the sensations end up being so long afterward that it takes me even longer before I make the connection. It makes me wonder how much of the opportunities that arise are being wasted if that's even a thing.

I have really done my best to stop worrying about nocturnal emissions. My main pain point regarding that is the physical pain I feel after it happens. If Sussch is right on point about me not letting the energy build up then perhaps I could more gently move my ability to tolerate to a higher level and still maintain my celibacy. I really don't care anymore about the amount of time I spend celibate at this point as the numbers have been nothing but a source of depression and negativity. Losing the extra sexual energy due to an involuntary emission physically hurts and that is something I want to avoid. I can't keep running from this stuff when it gets tough. Thanks for the reminder that ejaculation is a stress response. I had completely forgotten about that. It really puts more gold on top of my discovery of the underlying depression I found bundled with the urges. Those are easily a stress response for me then.

"... watching things like a hawk, doesn't sound like it's bringing joy to your life. "

I don't exactly feel like it's not bringing joy either.

I am confused though at how anyone is able to feel the emptiness that you and Reggie both keep referring to. I know you say that it helps with dealing with the intense and vast energy that arises during our experiences. I "think" I'm seeing/feeling the emptiness but I am not certain and definitely can't seem to relate to the concept in any of my meditations.

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limpidprogress wrote:

I can really see how the ego wants to control reality by ignoring 99% of it whenever possible and my recent self discovery makes me believe that this new area of focus is allowing me to move past some of the ego. It would seem to me that this is part of the training that you're talking about. I would seriously love these emotional/physical issues to arise during my meditation sessions so that I can actually attribute it to the practice instead of it happening hours and sometimes days after when it's out of sight and mind. It would definitely help me a lot to not get confused about whether it is a result of that or something else in my environment. I want so badly to get rid of any notions I might have but how am I to do that with such a huge gap between the source and subsequent experience? I find myself acting out and getting angry, depressed, or whatever nonsense the sensations end up being so long afterward that it takes me even longer before I make the connection. It makes me wonder how much of the opportunities that arise are being wasted if that's even a thing.

"... watching things like a hawk, doesn't sound like it's bringing joy to your life. "

I don't exactly feel like it's not bringing joy either.


Hmm .. I'm not sure. Could be individual. For me it also hasn't brought joy directly. Years ago it helped me fix my thought-patterns and forgive myself. After that, joy simply resulted from relaxation and "being". Got lazy after a shut-down and currently I'm tackling the thought-patterns again.

 

limpidprogress wrote:

I can really see how the ego wants to control reality by ignoring 99% of it whenever possible and my recent self discovery makes me believe that this new area of focus is allowing me to move past some of the ego. It would seem to me that this is part of the training that you're talking about. I would seriously love these emotional/physical issues to arise during my meditation sessions so that I can actually attribute it to the practice instead of it happening hours and sometimes days after when it's out of sight and mind. It would definitely help me a lot to not get confused about whether it is a result of that or something else in my environment. I want so badly to get rid of any notions I might have but how am I to do that with such a huge gap between the source and subsequent experience? I find myself acting out and getting angry, depressed, or whatever nonsense the sensations end up being so long afterward that it takes me even longer before I make the connection. It makes me wonder how much of the opportunities that arise are being wasted if that's even a thing.


You could also try reliving the daily events in your mind, while observing the situation and your own actions without interfering. This releases the energy that has been stored as emotions, tension or stress. Recapitulating, also what the ancient stalkers used to do. This way you should be able to get the emotions during practice as well. ;)

In my mind that's one of those practises on level with "White Skeleton Meditation" -- would take several days at full concentration to do properly.

Hmm .. this reminded me of how crystals act in nuclear radiation. With radiation damage, energy is stored in the crystal. Later when you heat the crystal, the stored energy is released and the crystal recovers. That was simplified quite a bit, though.



-- Edited by Sussch on Friday 22nd of January 2016 06:24:36 PM

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When I first started meditating it brought me a lot of joy because I was able to distance myself from a lot of the pain and negative mentality. That distancing has become fairly normal for me now and I'm thinking that perhaps I'm needing to now learn how to go into the experience as you guys have said but not be the experience. I have to say that all of this is very hard to grasp. lol. I do understand that relaxing and "being" can bring joy and peace since I've had a taste of that here and there which is nice. I'll try reliving daily events and see how that works. I was feeling some intense anxiety the other day from something my wife said that brought back some difficult memories. I think I'll start with that and see if it's too much.

"In my mind that's one of those practises on level with "White Skeleton Meditation" -- would take several days at full concentration to do properly."

Have you mentioned this in another conversation? I've heard a little about the white skeleton meditation from pewep but I haven't yet learned how to do it. He did give me the instructions though. :P

"Hmm .. this reminded me of how crystals act in nuclear radiation. With radiation damage, energy is stored in the crystal. Later when you heat the crystal, the stored energy is released and the crystal recovers. That was simplified quite a bit, though."

Neat! We are living crystals, or so I thought, so I guess this really is a great comparison of how we can get old trauma and release it. No sweat if you can't find it but I'd love to read more about this.

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Regarding "White Skeleton Meditation", I always feel I'm not doing it correctly. Even though it has an effect, I think I need a lot stronger concentration ability for it.



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The unreal hath no being; there is no non-being of the Real; ~Krishna

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That's how I feel regarding anything I've done up to now. lol.

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When i managed to do "White Skeleton Meditation" "correctly", it lead me to either sleep paralysis/astral projection, uh fun times.



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